If you are interested in dating a disabled woman, there are a few things to keep in mind in order to avoid a disastrous date. First and foremost, this person for whom you have an interest is a person and should always be approached, respected, and treated as such. If you are able to remember that, then you should have no problem avoiding these 4 common mistakes men make when dating a disabled woman.
The first and most common mistake that men make when dating a disabled woman is in thinking of the woman as a disabled woman, instead of as a woman with disabilities. This means that you are defining this woman by her disabilities instead of seeing her first as a person. All of us have challenges of some kind in our lives that we need to overcome and for some these daily challenges are more profound than for others. Regardless of her disability, see her first as a person, so that in your mind you are not dating a disabled woman, but you are dating a woman. That makes a big difference in not only how you see her, but in how she sees you as well.
Another very common mistake that is made by men when dating a disabled woman is to either completely avoid talking about or asking about her disability, or even worse, trying vainly to just pretend it isn’t there. This is something which is a part of her life, and avoiding it or pretending it doesn’t exist will send a very strong message, which, if you really like this woman, you do not want to send. She will think that either you are not interested in her or that you are embarrassed by her; neither of which is good. Ask her about her disability and how she feels talking about it with you. That way you will both know what is ok to talk about and what you should stay away from. This is at least until you get to know each other better.
The other side of avoiding discussion about her disability and another major mistake would be to completely obsess over it. If that is all you can think to talk about with her she is either going to think that because of her disability, you don’t see her as a woman, or that you are really bothered by her disability. Either way, this date will probably be the last date.
Treating her differently than you would another woman is a mistake often made by men when dating a disabled woman. Obviously, if she is in a wheelchair you wouldn’t want to ask her to do something that required climbing a long flight of stairs, but don’t assume that she needs or wants to be treated differently than anyone else. Ask her, before you do something for her, if it would be alright for you to help her with something. For example, “May I get your coat for you?” is perfectly acceptable whether you are dating a disabled woman or not. If you are not sure if you should do something or not, just ask her. She will be pleased that you care enough for her feelings to ask, and you will both be more comfortable afterwards.
Every woman is different, whether you are dating a disabled woman or not, she wants to be treated like a woman first. Be honest and ask her what is acceptable and what is not acceptable concerning her disability. She will respect you for your consideration of how she feels and you will both be able to be more comfortable together and able to enjoy your time together. Doing these two things first, will help in avoiding the 4 common mistakes men make when dating a disabled woman.
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